Voice Dialogue / Parts Work
All of us go through the process of socialization, whether we want it or not. We come into this life in a particular family system. It is inevitable that we are conditioned by our family to think, behave and act in certain ways. Some traits and behaviours that we exhibit are deemed acceptable and others unacceptable. Even though the desirability of certain traits have similarities across the globe, they also tend to differ, depending on the particular cultural, ethnic and social environment. This conditioning process is what allows for the development of our different Selves.
We call ourselves by one name, but in fact we are comprised of many different Selves. We can call these Selves – our sub-personalities. As children, the traits and behaviors which helped us stay safe, loved and accepted within our social group were nurtured by our families and therefore became Primary Selves. For example: responsible, caretaker, pleaser, rational analytical mind, etc. And the traits and behaviors which weren’t encouraged and got us in trouble, as children, were forced into our unconscious mind. These are called Disowned Selves. For example: Angry, Self-Centered, Wild, Explorer, Frightened, Lonely, etc. The Selves are groupings of thoughts, feelings and behaviors that are built into the human psyche. Voice Dialogue is the method that applies to the theory of “Psychology of Selves”. It is the lifelong work of Dr. Hal and Sidra Stone, which developed it in the early 70s and have expanded it through teaching worldwide.
Every person has a system of Primary Selves and a system of Disowned Selves. Becoming aware of these Selves is difficult, because generally we are identified with 1,2, or 3 of our Selves. And when this is the case, we don’t know about the rest of the Selves. Voice Dialogue gives us an opportunity to become aware of the Primary Selves that govern our life, so that we can separate from them and to learn how to embrace all of our Selves.
Why is it problematic to be unaware of your disowned selves? All of the selves that have been forced underground in our early upbringing, don’t disappear. No self ever disappears, no matter how hard we try to make it disappear.
For example, as the primary self develops, let’s say the responsible side, it tries to get rid of the parts of the person that are non-responsible. So the irresponsible, selfish parts go to the unconscious. From there, they find ways to make themselves known through dreams and various other ways. You can experience a suppressed/disowned self, by feeling an inner conflict about a decision you have to make. You can experience a disowned self taking over in certain triggering situations. Your being aims to be in a state of balance, so it always tries to integrated disowned energies within you. Whatever it is, that you may try to get rid of, that you have forced into the unconscious, will manifest in your relationships. Following the previous example, you are going to be either:
- strongly judgmental towards somebody who is irresponsible
- unbelievably attracted towards somebody who is irresponsible
- as is often the case – you would first be attracted and then repelled or the other way around (the love-hate kind of relationship)
As Voice Dialogue initiates and supports the awareness and embracing of the different selves, the process of developing an Aware Ego is also initiated. The Aware Ego development is incredibly important, because it gives us the freedom of choice. Instead of always sitting on polarized ends of the spectrum, you are able to find space in the middle and integrate the polarities within you. This is not about playing a zero sum game, where one part wins and another loses. The middle way is not about compromising, it’s about emerging with new perspective, which is able to hold space for both polarities/perspectives and it arises out of awareness and compassion.
Once we are able to stand between opposites and make choices in the Aware Ego position, this also gives birth to the Inner Teacher. Voice Dialogue work will trigger your personal authentic Inner Teacher and he will begin to make its appearance in your life. The dream process literally becomes a teaching process, where you can receive powerful inner guidance.
Something extraordinary happens when we are committed to this kind of inner process and integrating all of our selves. When you unhook from the various systems of selves that comprise the personality level, we begin to get in touch with our vulnerability and the primary unique frequency that we were born with. We also become more open to trans-personal energies – experiences that are not part of our personal experience. We become open to the archetypal and mythical nature of our psyche. This process allows for a personal freedom and transformation that can hardly be imagined. It is an amazing journey of discovery through a whole new world!
Length of the session: Sessions usually last anywhere from 1-2 hours.
Price of a single session: 150€ (Euro)
How is the session conducted? If you live in Denmark, we can possibly arrange a live session. However, this is not necessary for the Voice Dialogue Process to work and be effective. Therefore, the majority of sessions are done online, so you would need an internet connection.
Languages spoken: English, Bulgarian
How am I qualified to perform this work?
I am trained by Robert Stamboliev – a psychologist, trainer, coach and relationship therapist and the author of the book “The Energetics of Voice Dialogue”. He introduced and developed Voice Dialogue in most European countries.
- NOBCO/EMCC: 11 PE
- NIP: 32 PE for clinical skills
It sounds good, but you would like to learn more about the technique?
Below, you can see some videos on this topic:
Voice Dialogue is not a school of psychotherapy, it not a substitute for psychotherapy , and it is not a profession in and of itself. It is a technique for psychological exploration and for the expansion of awareness. Although it can be a highly effective tool, it should be clearly understood that it is not an autonomous therapeutic system. Voice Dialogue can be viewed as a tool, similar to meditation practices. It can provide amazingly powerful experiences and a good deal of personal information. It can be very transforming and healing, when it is facilitated by an experienced facilitator.
If you feel called to work with me or if you have any questions about the technique, feel free to contact me and I would gladly assist you! As a new client, you are entitled to a 20 minute free initial consulation!